This month was a weird one as we only had two shows, but one of them was the introduction to something we have been spending months building. In episode 232, we introduce the This Will Not Defeat Me project that is designed to help those that have dealt with past trauma. To kick this off, we built a video experience for those that went through sexual abuse and talked to Chris Davios about his experience and what it means for him to work on this with us. The next episode was looking at the parallels of religion and mental health with Pastor Ray Hardee. Between him and our own John-Nelson, we had a great conversation covering the shift of religion and society over the last few decades.
Tune in to see the June Month in Review Through a Therapist’s Eyes.
Links referenced during the show:
Current Event: the clt example with his anonymous permission: Facebook Effects… He is separating and divorcing… He meets a Girl in Costa Rico… Facebook sets up a friend request opportunity with his current wife and the girl he meets in Costa Rico
Intro Music by Reid Ferguson – https://reidtferguson.com/
@reidtferguson – https://www.instagram.com/reidtferguson/
https://www.facebook.com/reidtferguson
https://open.spotify.com/artist/3isWD3wykFcLXPUmBzpJxg
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Episode #234 Transcription
Chris Gazdik: [00:00:00] This is Through a Therapist’s Eyes on June the 29th, 2023. We join you here for the June month. In review, we have the man behind the curtains in front. Mr. Neil Robinson. How are you, man? Good, how are you? Yeah, pretty good today. It’s a weird day of like, very limited, no show, cancel summer schedule therapy.
Actually, I, I like
Neil Robinson: when like meetings get canceled and you, you get like freedom. It’s like you get, it’s nice to have that change of days. I literally
Chris Gazdik: watched Saving Private Ryan today in my office, if that tells you anything. That’s a long movie too. That’s now in fairness, I picked it up about a third of the way through.
It was on, but Yeah, that’s how it was. How are you Mr. Adam Kleer back with us this week? I’m good. I’m good. Yep. Yep. Gotta be more exciting than that. Growing tomatoes. [00:01:00] Yeah,
Adam Cloninger: we were talking about that. Yeah. Growing tomatoes.
Chris Gazdik: What else got, I don’t think those are tomatoes. What do you mean? The small tomatoes aren’t
Adam Cloninger: really tomatoes.
They’re called yellow. They pair
Chris Gazdik: tomatoes, baby tomatoes. And it’s not, it’s they’re babies. No tomatoes. You want big honking things you can put knobs in and cut and make big sandwiches out of and stuff. Man. These little baby tomatoes are, no,
Adam Cloninger: no. The small ones are for salads. The big ones are for
Chris Gazdik: sandwiches.
Definitely. Well, the big ones you can cut up and put into salads. Also ice can, but wedge tomatoes and salads. Yeah, I guess you could do that. Slices on sandwiches. My fancy,
Adam Cloninger: fancy lawnmowers. On the blink again. Oh.
Chris Gazdik: Different
Adam Cloninger: issue though. Different issue.
Chris Gazdik: You, dude, I’m gonna buy you a new damn lawnmower.
I’m sorry, I’m done with this. Yeah. Okay. Do that. I’m, I’m done with this. Getting you a new lawnmower. So what do we say here? This is through a therapist size where you get insights and thoughts about the mental health and substance abuse world directly from a panel of therapists on the month. In review, we kind of talk about what we talked about through the week through a therapist’s eyes.
Re-understanding [00:02:00] emotions and Becoming your Best Self is the book that I put out and it is not going to be a loan for very long out in the world. Adam, you you, you got a second motivated me man. You motivated me. Oh good. I was like, I cannot let 20, 23 end without, you know, getting the book. I’ve been slow cooking, so it’s gonna be on marriage and I have given myself the deadline with the editor cuz she wants to edit it in August.
So I’m like, oh my gosh, I have a deadline now. So
Adam Cloninger: was this a January goal? You had to have the book
Chris Gazdik: for end of the year. It became kind of a goal when you said it should be a goal to be, cause you know,
Adam Cloninger: if you don’t, if you don’t do it for the end of the year, you actually, you’re a
Chris Gazdik: failure. I’m not gonna be a failure.
I will not fail. I’m actually almost done with it actually. But I do need to finish it. Yeah. And I thought I was gonna finish with what I had and then I thought I had, and then I found I had more content to put in it. So actually it is gonna be a bit of a push contact through a therapist size is the great way to kind of contact us with it, interact with us.
Listen, this is the human emotional [00:03:00] experience, which we endeavor to figure out together. Question? I can’t, I can’t deviate from our current
conversation. We’ll have to come back to it. It’s what you’re just talking about though. Well, Actually, we’re not even have a conversation yet, so Yeah, sure.
I was just trying to be a smart Alex. Yeah, you’re good at it. I am
Adam Cloninger: not that good. So did, did you actually say, or do you actually know what the, the actual title of new
Chris Gazdik: book’s gonna be? No. We’ll have to go through the editor process and that’s cover and all kind. No, none of that has no sneak sneak for en email.
None of that has started. Okay. Yeah, so it, whether a matter of fact when it’ll be out, my goal would hopefully be that. See, that’s the slow process though, man, you know, to work with a publisher, do all that. I remember the last time y’all man is wicked slow, so I’m hoping it’ll be out by Christmas, but I probably failed because I pushed it back to, we could probably do a
Adam Cloninger: whole show on your, that’s Augusts October
Chris Gazdik: doing the book November.
So that’s like three, that’s only three months. I don’t know. That’ll be enough time at
Neil Robinson: once. You, you might, you might have a race with my kid. I’m pushing him to finish his book by the end of before he goes back to school. Oh, the race is hard. [00:04:00] So he’s, he’s like 38,000 words or something. He’s, he does a thousand words a day.
Now. That’s the, if he doesn’t do it every, every word he gets less than a thousand. He’s grinding from technology
Chris Gazdik: a minute. Your kid has a book with 30,000
Adam Cloninger: words.
Neil Robinson: 37,000, 38,000 now.
Chris Gazdik: Okay. That’s just trippy. Weird dude. How do you know he actually
Adam Cloninger: reads
Neil Robinson: them? Do what? How do you know he actually reads the words?
Oh no. He uses Google Docs to count where he started and basically he can select and do word
Chris Gazdik: count Google Docs. Now he has just done a chat G p T book. Oh, no, he’s writing
Neil Robinson: it literally. He’s been working on it for about nine months. But yeah, so. Yeah, he’s, he hates actually ai. I’ve talked to him about it, using it for some of his other projects, and he is like, I’m never gonna use ai.
It’s horrible. It’s the worst thing ever, blah, blah, blah. So he likes the idea of
Chris Gazdik: actually doing more. Let us forward. Let me forward us along. We are going to do the Month in Review show, which as you know by now, if you’ve been joining us, it begins off with the now named Rabbit Hole. Rabbit Hole. Yep. We are going to play [00:05:00] Rabbit Hole.
Mr. Clouder, you take it away, brother. What do you got?
Adam Cloninger: All right. So with Rabbit Hole, what I basically do is whatever I’ve come up with for in the month something that just I thought was of interest, I keep it in the back of my mind. Come back and give it to Chris and Neil and see what they have to say about it.
So the thing I have to talk about today is I’m wondering, and I’m really hoping that y’all haven’t done a show in this already. Cause if you haven’t, you really, I think you need to. Have you ever heard of Rage
Chris Gazdik: Rooms? I have. Have you heard of Rage Rooms? I think I
Neil Robinson: have. No, only I can think of was with Rage Room is like a, a card tournament where it’s a bunch of geeks that lose and they get mad at each other and flip over tables.
So no, I have not heard of a rage room.
Chris Gazdik: Okay. That’s pretty much what it is, if I’m thinking correctly, right?
Adam Cloninger: Yeah. So this, this is how it started. So a guy I work with showed me a video on his phone, and it’s a, a guy in a room and he’s got like a shield on and gloves and he’s has, has like a baseball bat and he’s going around in the room and he is like smashing the [00:06:00] TV and plates and he’s throwing stuff and just, I’m like, oh yeah, that looks cool.
And he’s, he says, oh, that’s raid room. And I’m like, a what? A rage room. There’s, it’s actually. It’s actually getting B word’s business popping up everywhere. I could
Chris Gazdik: believe it. I could believe it is. Is it catching on steam? It is. That would be fun to,
Adam Cloninger: it’s really, really catching on. So it started, I think it was in 2008 or 2003, and Japan was the first one that, no shit.
Chris Gazdik: I wonder if there’s a franchise with that. That would be awesome. I would be interested possibly in that, honestly. Yeah. Well
Adam Cloninger: there’s, I really would. There they actually, there’s like several, like three or four in Charlotte that I know of. No kidding. Yeah, but I’m not sure. Gosh, it’s a
Chris Gazdik: good idea. Gosh. I think it is.
Why would you say that? Well, first of all tell, tell us what a rage room
Adam Cloninger: is. Okay. So basically it’s kinda like I was saying the guys in the room. So you pay to go someplace and for a fee you can go and break stuff. Hmm. Not your stuff. They supply the stuff. You, you, you, you break it. Of course there’s [00:07:00] a, you know, a disclaimer you gotta sign or whatever.
But you go in there and you break stuff and the, the thought behind it is you go and find a release find a way to get your anger out. And I thought it was a good idea first, but then when I started going outta rabbit hole, oh, I’m not so
Chris Gazdik: sure it actually is. Where did you go down the rabbit hole to find that it is not a good thing.
There’s, I am going to clinically foreshadow and disagree with the results of your rabbit hole.
Adam Cloninger: Okay? So there is a few people that think that you might be rewarding yourself for having rage. Okay? Therefore it can actually increase your
Chris Gazdik: age. Okay.
Adam Cloninger: Instead of the release. Just getting over that. So the couple, the couple little stipulations they had is if you do this type of stuff, you have to focus it on something that you’re trying to like a negative thing.
And [00:08:00] one, one example was there’s actually a place in Arizona, they have a, a licensed clinician there. Okay, cool. You have to have a therapy session with the, the person there with the rage room session. And one of the examples they gave was she had this plate and it said, I’m not good enough. Right.
Right. So that’s one thing you had to put in the room and you had to focus on, you had to destroy that plate. Right. I can see that being a good thing, but. If you’re just going on a regular basis where you’re paying a monthly fee and you’re going and is there a membership too? Said there are memberships and every video you see on it, they talk about the, the, the memberships that’s available.
Oh,
Neil Robinson: I’ve seen anywhere from 15 to $300
Adam Cloninger: a
Chris Gazdik: month. Well,
Neil Robinson: interesting. But how, I mean, wouldn’t that be comparable to someone who goes to like, say nine rounds boxing or to gym or like some of those places where the physical release is still there? Yeah, like you, you could, cuz like I said, and, and you’re doing exercise too.
Yeah, [00:09:00] exactly. So I could see the benefit of, I’m with you Chris. I think that can be like clinically like that release versus having it bottled up and you’re damaging something that you’re not actually hurting someone else. So if you have a lot of pent up aggression or anger towards a significant other, a
family member like the, like that may sound weird, but like you’re getting it out and you’re not harming another person unless you get like a piece of glass in your eye or something.
But that’s, yeah, that’s yourself. But I’m with you. I think it’d be a great idea and I love the fact that there’s some that have the clinical side
Chris Gazdik: of it too. That’s what really makes me interested. I could take this franchisee thing, listen, if you have a franchisee opportunity for me, Chris ick at through a therapist says, you need to contact me.
Cuz I’m very interested in this. Seriously. I do business in my mind. And, and you know, with the that, that would be, that would be something I’d be, I’d be real interested in looking into and I have the professional expertise to kind of design some of these things. It would be pretty freaking cool. Because here’s the deal.
Yeah, Neil, this is a clinical thing like [00:10:00] I’m actually gonna talk about a friend of mine who went to a therapist and had this designed as an activity for her to. Heal from struggles that she had. Right? So she was told literally by this therapist to go ahead out to like a, a garage sale and whatever, and get a, a teapot set, get plates and cups and, you know, whatever is in this, and get a whole set and write messages on the set, such as, you know, the, the thing that she was dealing with clinically, you know, the breakup from her boyfriend or the divorce that she had, or maybe it was a family issue.
Honestly, I forget what issue it was that she, she said she had, but she wrote all these things out and she, he, therapist told her, go ahead and put a plastic sheet down, go into your garage, tape it down so that you know everything’s saved. You know, get goggles, whatever. I’m sure they had the suggestion and just whip these things, you know, one after the other into the garage as a, as a major release, specifically phone, [00:11:00] you know, formatting it in, in, into the, the issue that you wrote about and that you were dealing with.
I’ve shown. Or given assignments for people to take, you know, lemons or apples. Same thing, just pegging a, a, a tree and just, you know, there’s something about that release. A really good example related to trauma. There’s a lot of body energy that you have in your body when you have a mental health kind of reality, particularly if something’s chronic.
Sexual abuse we’re gonna talk about tonight, you know, with this will not defeat me after sexual abuse is the video experience that we have. We didn’t talk about
it in that video experience, but another activity that is known to release body energy. This training was talking about finding a physical movement.
So I’ve told clients pay attention to physical movement. And when you’re working out and doing pushups or if you find yourself in, in head motions or, you know, pushing away from the desk when you [00:12:00] get from work, any movement like that, pay attention to your body and what really feels good. And because the example of this clinician gave at this training was a person that drove bus buses for school.
And she went around in the wintertime and checked the bus, you know, before she went off on a route. And she was working in therapy, she had sexual trauma and she kicked the tire of the bus and she’s like, oh, that felt, that felt good. You know, like that motion. Wow, that motion. And so they developed this routine and she would kick the tires when she was stressed out on her bus, circling around her bus.
And it was very rewarding for her. And she did this daily. It was very healing. Now why is that significant? Because when she found that specific and particular body motion, you know, that may have been related to emotional trauma, that her brain and body stored up, you know, when she, she wasn’t able to kick somebody off of her.
Right. The, so your [00:13:00] body actually totally remembers with emotional memory what happened to you and what it smelled like, what it felt like. And when you, when you find healing motions and movements and all of that, that goes in, I mean, there’s, there’s a lot I could keep on going on, but there is a lot, a lot of reality to physically discharging you know, energy that you have in your body.
And if we were able to do that regularly, like you were talking about Neil, I, I budged a little bit of my brain on a membership, Adam, about like, oh, that’s different. Hey, I might like a membership. If I have somewhere that I can really discharge my week’s energy before I go home and do a psychological displacement on my dog, that’s a psychological defense mechanism.
Let’s do a show in a, it’s a, it’s a lot there. It probably is a worst show. You can tell. I’ve got a, I got a lot of thoughts about it now. I’m talking
Adam Cloninger: about a show in a rage room. Mm-hmm. Not on
Neil Robinson: a rage room. Seriously. Well, where all, where the body showed is while someone else is, we’ll, we’ll, a, we’ll have
Adam Cloninger: a shield.[00:14:00]
Go on site. It’s
Chris Gazdik: Chris’s turn now. The room might not make it. I’m not kidding. You’ll
Neil Robinson: have to check the comments. Cas is chiming in on this one’s. Oh boy. Her, her perspective’s interesting. You know, she, she doesn’t agree with the rage room, she thinks does not, she thinks this juvenile gives permission for ridiculous behaviors.
There’s better, better ways to handle anger, not through destruction. And then she also came back and said she got mad, really mad one time and threw a dining room chair against a wall and put a big dent in it and felt bad. So but no, I, I think you need to be constructive with it because just like in anything else, you know, sometimes it could promote a behavior that you don’t actually address what’s going on behind it.
You know, just like anything else, you need to address the stuff behind it instead of just, I just want to go there to break, break
Adam Cloninger: stuff. But when, when you do something, you do something like to break something or, and you get stress out, it makes you feel better.
Chris Gazdik: It really does make feel. Could that not be
Adam Cloninger: rewarding your body into thinking, I need to be upset [00:15:00] about something again so I can get that reward.
Chris Gazdik: It, it is not like a dopamine kick that is damaging or addictive in the addiction kind of parameters. I don’t believe. I mean, it, it operates in a different wavelength. There are people that are like, you know, you see personalities that are thrill seekers or adrenaline junkies. I don’t know that that it, it could be the kinda the
Adam Cloninger: same thing.
I don’t, I,
Chris Gazdik: I don’t know it well. I, I don’t know that that’s necessarily a bad thing that it, it, it’s probably something that. A rage room per se, would be more
important for them because thrill seeking folks, and I’ve got a little bit of that. I’m, I’m an adrenaline junkie. I like, you know, to do fun different things.
We went skydiving for my 40th birthday. I mean, I have total desire to go massive spelunking in, in, in really an unexplored [00:16:00] cave. That would be great. And I really wanna go out west to do what’s it called, the slot canyons. Slot canyoning, yes. Oh
Adam Cloninger: my god. That I’m not familiar with that.
Neil Robinson: Amazing.
There, there’s can canyon trails or trails in the Grand Canyon where it’s very, very narrow when you’re going through it and you’re basically just, you go into it and then you can pretty much have to work your way through it. You ever gone splunking like at some of the caverns, like in Kentucky or West Virginia and you literally, like, I’ve gone with my family and there’s spots you barely squeeze your way through and there’s this excitement of like, barely fitting and you make it through this Getting stuck.
Yeah, getting
Adam Cloninger: stuck. Can I make it,
Chris Gazdik: can I make it? Yeah, there’s that, that to me seems like a wonderful outing, you know, like I would, I would love to. So you’re, so you’re agreeing with the rage room thing? I, I really am. I’m, I’m actually excited about the concept. I didn’t, I didn’t know that this is probably the best rabbit hole ever.
I wanna just stay here because it is fun to talk about, and honestly, I think we probably do need to [00:17:00] do a show on rage rooms and, and, and I need to research it a little bit and see what’s going on out there. And because I, I think that there’s a, I love how mental health is becoming more and more culturally aware, like we have.
You know, psychobabble on our regular lingo, right? We, we have an awareness about mental health being like, more okay to talk about. And, you know, it, it, it’s, it’s funny, I, I could see how people would see this as juvenile and, and, and odd because we have a suppression culturally, particularly in the states.
I don’t know, not show you’re angry about something. Don’t show. Don’t let ’em see sweat. Yeah. Don’t show your anger. Sex is a bad th
don’t have it. We’re not supposed to like it and want it. We don’t do killing you know, we don’t kill for our animals. We just somehow have it show up on our plate.
You know, there’s these weird things that are, are a normal part of human reality mm-hmm. That we’ve gotten so far from [00:18:00] that. Gives our bodies, gives our psyche weird. It’s a dichotomy. So you’re
Adam Cloninger: saying it’s like a
Chris Gazdik: need, it’s a dichotomy because there, there are, it’s a part of the human exper emotional experience, but it is suppressed and, and denied.
And anger is a great emotion. It will keep you day gum alive if you mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. If you think about why we have it, you know adrenaline is an amazing feeling when you can run. I mean, you could run faster, think quicker, you know, hit harder, lift more, I mean, It, it, it’s necessary not hurt until tomorrow.
Adam Cloninger: Maybe that,
Neil Robinson: that, that’s when you get older. That’s not adrenaline, that’s just an age thing. But no, I’m also thinking about like, you know, people who shoot, you know, people who you shoot guns for the first time that explosiveness, that power band. Cuz I love watching those people that are like anti-gun control, right?
And then they take ’em to a gun range and you watch these people like, these like kind of like, well, whatever. I’m not gonna go into that. But they, they shoot guns for the first and you [00:19:00] just see their eyes open. They’re like, That is so that release, like that ex that explosiveness. Yeah. That’s interesting.
Which is interesting cuz I don’t know if I’d do a rage room cuz I have this weird issue about like just that chaoticness or breaking that loud piercing. I’d rather go to gym and hit like a punching bag versus a rage room.
Chris Gazdik: Well it’s something that we need to be able to do. I’m glad this came back in my head.
Boy Adam, you hit a gold mine here cuz I got a lot to say. Like, really? So I watched a show Navy Seals were doing a training and they, they just took like famous people out to do this training. It was a recent sort of live TV or real life TV thing. Did, did you see that by chance? You shook your head like you did?
No, I, I dangit, I forget the name of it. They set up like a training course that was based on things you would get military training with. Okay. And it was sort of a lot of ropes course kind of stuff, right. But it was pretty dramatic. Like they were walking over a ravine and [00:20:00] doing some things like this and, and you had to really, you know, create courage or, or create confidence.
You know, it really challenged you to, to fight through your fears. So interestingly enough, people are afraid of anger. They’re afraid of allowing themselves to express the anger that we have. That’s a real thing. And so it was interesting because they set up one of these. Training exercises where the Navy SEAL instructor is all dressed up in the protective gear, like you can’t hurt them, basically.
And, and the participants are instructed to run around the corner and attack the fight and attack and, and draw out your rage to hit this person repeatedly and attack them, essentially to kill them, and then on command immediately to stop. [00:21:00] And it was really, really interesting to see people afraid to allow their anger to be expressed.
And then the process of immediately stopping that and then corralling and managing your emotion with it. I wonder,
Adam Cloninger: did anybody like keep on hitting? They’re like,
Chris Gazdik: stop, stop, stop. Yeah. No, but sort of, I mean, I can see that, I mean, there’s, there’s a little bit of that because you, it’s like crying, like people tell me sometimes a lot of different situations, like, look, honestly, I’m afraid to cry cuz if I start, I won’t stop.
Because we’ve pent up that emotion so much, and we need to be able to let that anger out. We need to be able to let that emotion out and do it in a controlled, responsible, and safe manner. It’s when you suppress it, it bottlenecks, and when it explodes out, it’s, it’s an ugly sight sometimes.
Neil Robinson: And, and I’m thinking with the rage, I was thinking about like the idea of like some of the medication that people give for like a, a, D, D, adhd, those types of things.
And you’ve talked about that’s a tool or a piece of it. [00:22:00] And because what I think of the radio as another tool, when you have a suppressed anger, you need something to allow you to kind of get past that initial. You know, overflow. Yeah. And then once you kind of, for go for the first couple times you’re getting it out.
Now you can now manage it a lot easier where like when you have, like my stepdad will have to take medication cuz he’s, he’s always working and sometimes he just needs like that Ritalin to slow him down enough that he can then process and handle it. Mm. And so the rage room, if you use it correctly, cuz she talked again, Cass also comment again.
But I think, I think I got her going. I think it’s really important because if you don’t know how to react to it, you have to have a controlled situation that they can deal with that overflow or that flood of emotions. And then it might be, you know, 2, 3, 4, 5 times before they finally get to where like, oh, okay, now I know how to process it.
Now I know how to handle it. Because I’ve basically pushed myself so hard that Okay, I’m done with that initial, that initial outburst. Yeah. Or.
Adam Cloninger: It’s been so [00:23:00] wonderful that I must stay mad all the time. Cause I do, I’m really enjoying being mad because I enjoy the release of Crashing.
Chris Gazdik: It’s interesting breaking stuff.
I don’t think you can, I don’t think you can remain mad that long because it’s like any other emotion. It
Adam Cloninger: has not remain mad. I’m talking about you get a reward for it and your brain starts thinking, Hey, when I got mad
Chris Gazdik: last time, yeah, it just doesn’t work. I work that way man. It doesn’t, it just doesn’t work that way.
You know what would be interesting for you to do, and I think we’ve actually, this has been the best rabbit hole ever. I need to put a break on it so we can get to our reviews from the show, from the shows this week. But it would be interesting if you have the time when you, when you’re coming up with a topic, especially like this, like bring a study or something, quote, quote.
Like something that that, that somebody has, has done a little study from. You know, you, you shouldn’t be too hard with Google. Cuz I would be really curious what. It like I, I, I want to go home and, and, and, and Google this up and, and see he’s gonna continue the rabbit hole. I want to [00:24:00] continue the rabbit hole to see if there’s anybody that could present a psychological study of any merit that would be against, against it.
Against it. Okay. I I, I’m willing to say, I, I would be very surprised if there’s somebody, I bet you there is I psychological be community. There is. That could demonstrate that. I bet there is. I’d be surprised if there were, we got, we got, we got a good weekend coming at ’em. We got a good weekend conversation coming up.
All right. What are we doing? Oh, I have a current event that I wanted to do also. So I’ll, I’ll be, I’ll be brief with this because the the, you sell your dad the. The current event actually is something that we’ve done sort of before, I think. But it’s, it’s one that I love being able to bring out with examples more and more and more of this happening.
And it has to do with social media. So just think about the implications and the realities that this little situation [00:25:00] that I’m gonna describe creates. Cuz this is pretty common and replicated over and over and over again and will be more so I think as we move forward, and I submit to you early on here, in my opinion, that this is really societally problematic.
Okay? And I have permission from this person that that’s happened to recently. I’ll share it broadly so I’m not breaking any confidence of his, but, but he said it was okay to share it in, in a way that gets close to being it so you can understand. So, He’s going through a separation, moving towards a divorce now.
Okay. And they have boundaries of, you know, I guess they’re moving into like, it’s okay to date, you know, other people in that, in that realm. But even that, if it’s laid out or not, can you imagine this still happening? Because he took a trip to another country[00:26:00] as is his family’s tradition, and he met somebody and he dated and they exchanged names and numbers and they, they’ve been talking, you know, just like the kids say, right, we’re talking.
We’re just talking. Well, they were dating and whatnot, and this was a private matter. He wanted to keep it, you know, to himself. And he’s on Facebook and Facebook is doing their algorithm shift. I
Adam Cloninger: know where this is going now, right? Yeah. I know where this is going.
Chris Gazdik: Yep. And this is happening all the time.
Go ahead and take it. I’m curious. No, no, no. I know, I know where you’re going cause
Adam Cloninger: you know where I’m going. You’ve seen it happen. I know what story you’re talking about now.
Chris Gazdik: Oh yeah. I didn’t tell you about it cuz it just found out I just, I’m
Adam Cloninger: talking about the Facebook thing. I know. Go ahead. Yeah,
Chris Gazdik: yeah, because the, this, the friend suggestion algorithms in Facebook sent this woman’s thing to my guys’ separated wife and, and is is like connecting them, you know, to make friendship on [00:27:00] Facebook.
Thus enabling and opening up interaction, you know, for if they would so choose to do so. Facebook’s connecting an ex-wife with a new girlfriend in their anatomical process of algorithms with friend requests. That’s bad. Like that’s particularly if you don’t have agreements to date. And Facebook’s doing that, or if you have new experience with this, it’s just, it’s all kind of messed up when somebody else is actually taking this and, and creating a scenario for you.
For the whole goal was to
Adam Cloninger: make it think like a human
Chris Gazdik: right. I just see so many implications with this and it is not what we need to do as a society. Setting up these things where people are having their prophecies infringed upon in that sort of a dramatic way. I mean, I agree. Creating emotional distress unnecessarily.
It’s crazy to me.
Adam Cloninger: I agree, but I’m still saying, but that’s kind of [00:28:00] what the whole purpose and all these platforms is, is kind of make it where it thinks like a human, reacts like a human
Chris Gazdik: starting to Yep. Be,
Adam Cloninger: starting to be. We won’t go into AI
Neil Robinson: yet. Well, but I think here’s the issue with a lot of the, the technologies is it’s all data driven.
There’s, and that’s one of the concerns with AI, is that with, once you set your criteria, The system just does what is designed to do without any forethought or
ideas. Cuz if you think about it, if it was a human doing that they’d be like, oh, correlation. I know they’re separated. I’m not gonna introduce her.
The, the technology and the social media is like, oh yeah, there’s commonalities here, let’s connect them. And all it is, it’s just doing what it’s designed to do without ramifications or thought process of the human. The human
Chris Gazdik: side of it, the human emotional experience. Right, right.
Neil Robinson: Yeah. And so I think, I think it’s a big problem too, because you do get rid of a lot of those things.
It’s like the target who basically the, the [00:29:00] daughter was looking for different products. Come to find out what the algorithm they were looking at, how they did it. They sent coupons for like baby stuff to the house. We’ll, come to find out, you know, the dad found out that his daughter, I think it was either his daughter or his wife was pregnant before they knew they were pregnant be just because of the analytics and the way the systems work and the intelligence without the intelligence of, oh, maybe we shouldn’t send baby products to a house if they haven’t officially said, you know, so there’s those things, like it’s a smart tool.
It’s very great in what it could do. The technology is amazing, but, and.
Chris Gazdik: And it’s creating emotional problems, I think, with people. Is this where the story you were thinking about Adam or kind of is it Yeah. Right. So I, I’ll get off of, we got other things to get to with our shows this month, but dude, like that was to me, I, I, I, my mind just wonders with this new and I, this new reality we’re facing.
And I, I’ll remind you again, like, look, [00:30:00] we, we really as a, as a human. Race across the world. Do not have any idea emotionally, like our systems emotionally do not know how to handle this stuff. It is, it is not anything that humans have dealt with before and it’s changing and so rapidly and creating, you know, what did, what did John from the show, I think last month, talked about we’re living in the age of anxiety.
Yeah, it was a couple
Neil Robinson: weeks ago, but yeah, he, he taught about the age and that was like, that hit spot on.
It
Chris Gazdik: is spot on. Yeah. Okay, so let’s get to the shows. We, we really had weird timing this. Month. We had like a long month last month. And then we, we brought you in, Adam. We did the month and review a week later, and then we got jacked up on a week.
So it’s kind of been a weird month for our crew. As a matter of fact, I was talking to Victoria in the office today, Neil, and she’s like, ah, I haven’t even done a show in like a month. She, we really haven’t had John Victoria around for a month, so strange.[00:31:00] Which one do we do first, I guess Neil, technically
Adam Cloninger: the,
Neil Robinson: the, the 2 33 actually was YouTube live first I think because you scheduled it with your pastor and then we did 2 32 with the, those will not de defeat me, was erred afterwards.
Oh, that’s right. The order. It was even weirder. Yeah. Cuz trying to schedule with, with Davos for his, cuz he was outta town, which we were expecting. And then you already had the one lined up with your pastor. So that was the other issue with this month was trying to coordinate with the two other guests.
Chris Gazdik: That was so awesome to have my pastor on. That was, that was
Neil Robinson: also the dynamic with. John Nelson. And, and your pastor was definitely an interesting, cuz you had these old school guys that had been doing it for so long. Yes. Similar but different. The, the back and and forth
Chris Gazdik: minister and a non-denominational pastor talking about, you know, the parallels between religious teachings and mental health suggestions I thought was, was really, you know, pretty amazing off the cuff.
Adam, [00:32:00] I’m curious what the layman would think when opposed question is put out there. Are there parallels? What are the parallels? Where does this intersect? Do you see this as a contradictory thing, mental health and religion, or do you see this as a complimentary reality between mental health and religion?
What’s, say you,
Adam Cloninger: I see that There are like similarities. It’s kinda like religion and science. It’s kind of it’s an explanation of things. So I mean, I can, I can see
how they’re kind of related and I can see where, you know, maybe one I can like lead to the other. Is that what you mean? Or,
Chris Gazdik: well, I mean, whatever direction you take it, because honestly, well, what do you think, Neil, what, what came out was is it, is it complimentary or contradictory, more complimentary with each other or more contradictory to each other?
Neil Robinson: I [00:33:00] think if you look at the root of a lot of religions, I think it’s more complimentary, but I feel like as we’ve had the episode about religious trauma, a lot of the stuff in practice it is, it seems like it really does butt heads in how that it’s, it’s designed or enforced, but in theory, you know, when you look back at the root of it and what the purpose of a religion is, I think it’s very complimentary.
But once again, it’s, it’s, humans have changed it. People abuse the systems, people change their perspective on it. There’s all these things that happened that has made it very appear very contradictory.
Chris Gazdik: How did Ray talk about this? I, I, I do you, do you remember guys? He, he was kind of like, well, this goes back all the way to, you know, the philosophies and where we mental health kind of started in, you know, the far East philosophers, bringing in the, you know, a philosophic thinking and how that ran a ground or ran [00:34:00] against, you know, the religious orders of their, of their day.
And then of course we got into the psychology realm with Freud. I, I feel like he was talking about that. Do you, do you remember is in the beginning, kind of in the beginning of our conversation, I feel like.
Neil Robinson: I’m trying to think. Cuz they, they went and they went down so many rabbit holes in their conversations
Chris Gazdik: in this.
That was one big rabbit hole game, Adam. Right.
Neil Robinson: Like you said, you talked about with your show notes, it was pretty much just like, you just basically said, all right, all right, John Nelson Ray, here’s a topic. Go. And, and I think part of the thing that’s kind of interesting about mental health is that, you know, when that comes to the whole thing is like religion gives you, and that John Nells talked about this before.
Religion gives you an outside focus that kind of allows you to, or an outside purpose, let me rephrase that, an outside purpose outside of just yourself with a lot of the things whether, you know, Ray talked about marriage and that outside focus, the outside perspective or reasoning behind it. Like there’s a, there’s a thing that kind of helps you kind [00:35:00] of.
Eye on the prize kind of thing with a religion or the idea of a higher being or higher purpose, which is one thing John Nelson has mentioned
Chris Gazdik: before. Yeah, John, that was cool that he, he, he added that, which I, I like to highlight cuz I, I, that was a recent learning thing for me. And what, what, just to highlight that for a moment, you know, I would always kind of suggest to people in my therapy realm, I.
The order of priorities helps us to understand how we prioritize ourselves in relationship to to other people. And they did, you know, Ray confirmed it. You know that generally our order of thinking operates. And what I would tell people in therapy, God, at the top of the list, and I would say if God’s not in your realm or religion, then find self is at the top so God’s self.
Then your spouse, then your kids in those orders move down to family, then friends, and then work being the last. And we’ve talked about that on the [00:36:00] show before many times. But John added interestingly and has changed my spiel with that with people that I say, God at the top of the list and if religion isn’t a big factor for you, then a cause greater than yourself does need to be the highest emotional priority.
And I thought, wow, that that is something that I will add for the rest of my career, actually. Life. So a cause greater than yourself or God, is that in the new book, your creator than yourself, than your spouse, then you or it be in book three then you should I, that’s an interesting question. If
Adam Cloninger: it’s not, it needs to be in book three.
Chris Gazdik: I need to put that somewheres. Yep. You put that somewheres, it will be fresh content. Reviewing the self in the marriage book. Looking back at the first book, I haven’t figured out how I wanna lay that out yet, but since August is my deadline, I’m not going to be doing a whole lot. I can tell you with the original self stuff, that’s gonna have to wait for a later writing project.
I’ll just try to make you
Adam Cloninger: procrastinate so you can be a [00:37:00] loser,
Chris Gazdik: pile it up, make it harder. So I, I really felt like this thing was, was parallel because of my Christian beliefs and my psychological knowledge. I’ve married them for so long. Literally during that conversation, Adam, I was surprised to hear as much angst as Ray suggested is out there, where people differ in that it’s contradictory to each other.
Mental health and religion. There’s this big grinding, kinda like rage rooms what,
Neil Robinson: you know, there, there, there’s conflicting, there’s, there’s probably a, there’s probably a themed rage room with a bunch of religious
Chris Gazdik: stuff religiously themed rage room. Wow. But interesting. And, and I think
Neil Robinson: it’s a soci, I think it’s a societal thing there, there’s a whole breakdown on of our, the structure that has built society, that [00:38:00] society in itself has made religion such a negative, contradictory thing to your mental health.
I’m like
Chris Gazdik: naive. I feel like I’ve had my head under the rock because that just, I, I don’t, that’s not in my realm, man. I was surprised by that. I was genuinely kind of surprised that, that that was, you know, a thing. So
Adam Cloninger: what if the rage room has like different things that would be a, a token, so to speak, of each religion and then somebody decides, well I wanna, I wanna crush that one.
Chris Gazdik: I’m, I’m just saying you’re trying to build controversy into the rage. I’m trying to, reality
Adam Cloninger: it’s gonna,
Neil Robinson: happen’s, gonna happen. That would be a very interesting thing that’s gonna happen. I’m
Adam Cloninger: telling you it’s gonna happen. Then you’re gonna have people
Chris Gazdik: who’s gonna have news national shootings
We’re going Or, or, or you’re gonna
have ‘
Adam Cloninger: em where they’re gonna say, well, you know, there’s a rainbow news, Fox News. I want Fox News. You know, I mean anything. Seriously, it’s gonna happen. Trust me.
Chris Gazdik: Listen, here was the three questions. Yep. For the religion show that we did, how similar are religious teachings [00:39:00] compared to mental health suggestions?
Are there any major glaring areas of difference between religious beliefs and mental health knowledge and do religious people quotes? Consider mental health. And I didn’t finish all my thing here. What did I say on the show? Oh dear. The third question I just screwed up. Do religious people consider mental health to be, if I remember off of memory the like bad or negative or against them or something like that.
I forget what I had in my original show notes. But you have to go back to the original show. Yeah, I do. Yeah. Oh, Neil’s gonna help me out. Do you have it? No, the
Neil Robinson: original notes cut short too. Did the original notes cut short also?
Chris Gazdik: Yeah. Uhhuh. Yep. Good job. I screwed up. But you can go back to the original show and rewatch it.
I pro if it’s, I don’t know, it’s probably screwed up the original show. I don’t even know if he
Neil Robinson: covered like, I, like I said, it was
Chris Gazdik: kinda, cause it was really cool having Ray on us and, and I think that was a lively conversation. I think [00:40:00] religion is such a, what word? Right? Like it, it gets people really engaged.
In thought and discussion opinion and controversy. That’s a very, like
Neil Robinson: it’s engaging, polite way to, polite way to put it. Nowadays people get pissed. Yeah, we we’re, we talked about that before. It used, you used
to not talk about religion or politics or there were, what was the whole thing you used to not talk about like sex, religion, and politics.
Right. And and honestly to me it’s like politics has become number one where religions still second. Yeah, right. It’s a good problem. So, but, but yeah, I mean it’s, the thing about religion is it, it’s become so ingrained in us, whether it’s you’re religious or anti-religious, cuz that’s almost a religion in itself to be anti-religious.
But you know, going back to those questions, I think a lot of religious teachings are very similar to what we talk about in mental health because it is about focus, it is about You know, finding ways to help other people. There, there is a, [00:41:00] there is something in there when you read a lot of the teachings.
There is a lot of it about how do you manage yourself and maintain yourself
Chris Gazdik: well, what was cool is Ray actually is, see the idea of the show was we were gonna talk about our last show and then have Ray talk about his religious perspective on it. And then he was gonna talk about his, he started a podcast his, his show and topic.
We ended up doing it on his current sermon series, and we were gonna comment from a mental health perspective on it. And his, his current sur series that we’re, we’re still doing at our church is happiness 1 0 1. I mean, how, how, how is that not parallel to what we talk about or deal with in mental health?
You know, and, and he’s talking about the, the different religious backing and, you know, the Sermon on the mount and you know, how you know, being blessed is different than just being happy. And the, the, the things that the, the Christian, at least the Christian belief system operates for, and with us as higher level, I mean, it, it’s [00:42:00] very parallel to how do you deal with happiness, how do you deal with being well, how do you manage the emotions that you have?
And I just, I don’t know. I, I, I, I feel like they’re super, super strong parallels and science usually helps us to confirm the religious beliefs that are, are, are out there. I don’t think many science findings differ directly with what religious teachings.
Adam Cloninger: Well, that’s what religion is, is a way to try to explain things.
So they should have
Chris Gazdik: parallels. Yeah. Well, yeah, absolutely. About us and yeah, how to, how to operate. So, I don’t know. Moving on. I think we need to move on to the next one. This will not defeat me after sexual abuse. Listen, if you didn’t catch that show, you really need to check that one out because this is a video experience that we’ve created, Adam and I don’t know, did did you get to catch Chris DeVos’s?
No. [00:43:00] Sexual
Adam Cloninger: abuse story. I, I figured it had something to do with that other project you had. But
Chris Gazdik: he drops it, man. He drops it down for people and it, it’s such an honor to work with him because he is a man’s man. 25 year police veteran big dude African-American fella was, can I say that? Because in, in that race, men, black men or Hispanic men do not talk about feelings and emotions much as the old school cultural reality.
And he throws down a very detailed sharing of his sexual abuse and domestic violence that he lived through and endured as a kid. No bones and balls about it. It, it’s, it’s just straight powerful. And we developed a whole program around, you know, what do you do to manage you know, sexual abuse experiences.
What do you say, Neil? I mean, creating this video experience, the show that we broke it out, this, this [00:44:00] month on you know, You were the producer of that project as as, as well.
Neil Robinson: I mean, honestly through the whole experience. I mean, just, you know, I think the interesting thing was the rawness when Chris was telling his story where we were recording it was kind of interesting, you know, to see him actually go through the reaction it put him through, but yet to, to understand the amount of work he’s put in to get to this point, to deal with that.
Right. That’s what I don’t think a lot of people maybe understand that. Yeah. He’s talking about it, it seems like. Yeah. It’s just something he’s worked through. He’s, but like, even in like said years, even in the recordings, it still was affecting him. It was still right. And so you have to understand through this part, you can talk about the video experience.
This whole thing is a journey of repair and reparation on yourself. Like get yourself back to where you used to be. And it’s not a quick, it’s not gonna be a quick fix. It’s gonna be something that takes time, but you have to make that
first step. And Davos a long time ago, made that first step. And he started connecting what happened?
And he started [00:45:00] figuring out what to do, what, you know, he reached out for help. He talked to people like it’s a long, it’s a long step to deal with trauma that he dealt with and, you know, kudos to him for what he’s doing. The fact that he can tell people the fact that he’s going out there and putting himself out, like this is amazing for him to do what
Chris Gazdik: he’s doing.
It’s too me as a dude. I mean, honestly, women have, and we talked about this in the show, you know, the Me Too movement. You, you remember, you, you heard about that. And thank, thank God we’ve got that reality that people have been able to come out and, and say, me too. I know it’s gotten in the news or in the world.
A little bit of con controversy, you know, women piling on, you know, famous people or whatever. Listen, women being able to come to the Me Too movement and talk about something that happened to them is a huge step forward in positive mental health realm for an issue that is held silent [00:46:00] and secret as it’s forced upon victims and whatnot.
And everything that I just said is triply. So for men, triply, so for men, thus, I would love to create a he too movement. And, and, and help people understand that, you know, men are affected by, by this too. Adam, question in your, in your circles and surroundings and travels and travails, have you ever come across to anybody that has sexual abuse?
Yeah. As a you? Oh, you have? Yep. That was an easy, quick answer. Sure. I was actually expecting a no no.
Adam Cloninger: That, that, that person had
Chris Gazdik: problems. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Do you think, you know, double digit people, because I’m gonna jump ahead of you, I mean, and say you probably do, I’m sure I
Adam Cloninger: know double digit people, but I, I wouldn’t say that I know of that. Right, right,
Chris Gazdik: [00:47:00] right. Yeah. It wouldn’t surprise me. It wouldn’t, you know, if we could just take a poll of everybody’s, I over 1200 people, man.
Adam Cloninger: I’m sure I know the double digit.
Chris Gazdik: Yeah. And I’m, and I’m actually talking about people that you actually know. Yeah. On, on a, on a significant level. Of the hundred people in our circles, we have several people that have experienced some sort of sexual reality. And it is not just women. Can I say this clearer?
The, the reality of this is that it is a male issue, gosh, just as much. If not if, if, if not even possibly more. I might even make a crazy statement. So hopefully we’re blowing up some miss and launching out into the world with a video experience that’s really gonna help people kind of recover from the sexual traumas that they’ve, that they’ve endured.
So is that gonna be like a
Adam Cloninger: series or how’s that [00:48:00] working exactly. Go Neil, has that been determined
Neil Robinson: yet, or? I think the goal with this one not defeat me, is we want to, this is the start one. So people dealing with sexual abuse trauma, that’s the first, first video experience. Then we want to create a second series on like first responders and the trauma they deal with.
And the goal is we really want this to be an overarching platform for people. Ha. And helping recover through from different areas of trauma or different areas. So, so long-term goal is we want this to basically be a healing from almost any traumatic experience and help people get through those things.
But right now it starts with this one because this is really what the opportunity gave to us at the beginning. And I, like I said, I think we talked about. Do you guys pairing up again for the first responder? Cuz Davos was a police officer. Yeah, ironically. So so, so yeah. So that’s kind of the goal with that thing long term it’s, it’s bigger than just one course or one video experience.
Chris Gazdik: And, and very much [00:49:00] so. I mean, I call it a video experience, I think is, is a generation of my thought, Adam, because this is not like just as simple as, as a class that you take. I mean, it, it, it has actually do we ever research that Neil, we need to be able to say how much air time or viewing time is a part of this, you know, for $300, just under $300 you get like you know, Five hours of viewing time or something like that with a lot of direct
assignments and steps that you could take and strategies that you have that are taught and go walk, we walk with you.
It’s not just like a class. Right. Well, and and I
Neil Robinson: mentioned before it’s, I think it’s like 25 plus videos. Yeah. And the thing that we talked about is like when you go to a therapy session, you don’t go through and go to a therapy session here, oh, here’s, here’s five deescalation techniques. We’re gonna walk through them right now.
Right. The idea is that each video breaks down into something that you go through, you digest it, you process it, and then you’re ready for next. So you’re, you’re kind of getting like 20 therapy sessions, right? Absolutely. That [00:50:00] you can then go back to and you can watch. So I think it’s like, I think it’s only like two or three hours of total videos.
But like I said, the way we broke it down, because it’s you talking as Davos talking, there’s not a lot of back and forth, so we don’t have that, that extra airtime. But the fact is, you get the videos, you go back to it, you work when you feel comfortable, you, you get to do it at your own pace, in your own home.
And the goal with this is, it’s a, it’s a open door, just like with Davos early on to start that healing process, start going through these techniques, and then eventually you get to the point where you can go see a therapist, you can open up to your friends. You can have that interaction with people that you know.
And that’s, that’s the purpose of this. But yeah, I mean, I mean for what you get, how many. How many therapy, therapy sessions it would take to cover all of this contact. Oh my gosh, I can’t. And to go through it. And that’s why, that’s why we want this, because it becomes affordable for people instead of having to go through 10, 15, 20 therapy sessions and pay for it, even if they have insurance, they’re still all the other stuff that goes with it.
And you know, it’s worth it. Just not dealing with your insurance.
Chris Gazdik: I, [00:51:00] I could. Yeah. Indeed, indeed, indeed. I can tell you as a therapist, yeah. All the things that are covered in a video experience like this, that we’ve, that we’ve unpacked, I mean, it, it takes me such a long time in a therapy relationship to get to these things because there’s so much emotion and a reality of, you know, that we’re, that we’re dealing with, and this is, this is like, you know, me and Chris DeVos together, like with you talking about what he experienced and what works with strategies and how to manage this and, and how to kind of take some steps, you know, because a lot of the
question I have is like, okay, well I’m telling you Chris, in the initial interview that I have sexual trauma now.
What do we do? People do not have. Any idea what steps to, to take. And so this lays all of that out. So I’m, I’m super excited about, you know, this helping people and, you know, identifying, you know, in, so, Neil, where do they go? Honestly? How do they, how do they get this?
Neil Robinson: You go to this [00:52:00] one, not defeat me.com.
We do have it set up to where there is kind of a sample, so for free you can sign up, get kind of some example of what it looks like, what it’s, you know, start getting comfortable with it. If we’re not ready to dive into the whole thing, there is a $30, like first part where you can start looking at it.
And so the goal is depending how ready you are, 30 bucks, you, you can start with the free sample to kind of see, is this really gonna help me? Does this help me understand where I came from, what’s going on, what, what happened to me? And then, like I said, I find the first one is kind of the first session.
That $30 session is kind of preparing yourself to take this journey. It’s really about, you know, get yourself ready for healing, get yourself kind of, Prepped to start that. That’s kinda how, when we’ve talked about, that’s how I see this, for how we broke out that first session, because it’s so important to get, take that first step and start those pieces to start preparing.
Well, actually,
Chris Gazdik: the first step is, is, is the fire scene. Yes. You know, we, we sit around a bonfire and identify like, what’s going on with sexual abuse. It was, it was [00:53:00] really theatrical was kind of well done, I think. Really? Yeah.
Neil Robinson: There’s it’s funny there’s some new, new, have you seen that new documentary come out that Jim Covel whatever air stars in for mm-hmm.
About child trafficking and gosh, that stuff, gosh, there’s, yeah, there’s
Chris Gazdik: horrible. Oh, that’s a whole nother next level.
Neil Robinson: Yeah. Yeah. That’s, but it talks, you know, the abuse and those types of stuff, but it’s this becoming more commonplace cuz people are talking about these things and it’s becoming more prevalent.
How big of an issue Well, it’s being
Chris Gazdik: identified. Exactly. Yeah. It’s being identified. It has been running rampant in, in, in the human experience just oh, so badly. And again, like women were silent about this. They, there’s, there’s, there was not a way to even allow it to come out to talk about with people that, you know, and trust deeply.
It was such a taboo topic. This is one of the last strongest taboo things in the whole of [00:54:00] mental health and substance abuse that, that i, that I deal with. Well, like you said, the three things you don’t wanna
Adam Cloninger: talk about.
Chris Gazdik: Oh, big time. Yeah. So, you know, and, and again, triply, so for men, yeah. Triply. So for men, a man brings up any kind of sexual trauma or sexual weirdness that they endured, and it’s like, oh, you’re supposed to enjoy it.
You know? You mean to tell me you’ve got an older lady that had sex with you and you were a young man? Like, that’s great, right? Oh, like, no, it really, really isn’t. When your school teacher is inappropriate with you as a, as a pubescent boy, it’s really bad. It’s just, it’s so crazy. How, and, and Neil, to your point that is, it’s, it’s, it’s changing.
It’s, it’s changing. It’s starting to change just a little bit. And I’m excited about that. So if you have experienced anything with sexual abuse, I will speak to you directly and say, you will [00:55:00] learn that this will not defeat me after sexual abuse. This will not defeat me.com. You will learn with our conversations and Chris Chris’s sharing of his story, Chris Davos, courageous man telling you what he experienced, that you’re not alone with what that is that you went through, and also very much so that it was not your fault.
You know, we tell people that it’s not your fault. We tell little kids, but we really believe I did something to create this or doubt, you know, that it was even sexual abuse. We sometimes look at things being something that I wanted or that my body responded to. Like all of this. It, it, it was not your fault.
You are not alone. And that, that, that there is help that you can do in steps that you can take to be well. So please, if you experienced sir out there, or ma’am, you know, anything that’s inappropriate in your history or even that you wonder might be inappropriate with your sexual history, then explore it, talk about [00:56:00] this, check out our video experience and begin as Neil said, the first step, which is the toughest step to begin healing.
It’s a big deal. It’s a big deal. So I don’t know, man, how do we, how, how do I, how do we move from that? I feel like to end the show you’re saying? Yeah, well, Like, what do we say now? There’s just a lot there, you know, in being a part of this project, and I mean, guys talking about this topic with so many clients over the years, I mean, it, it’s, it’s a, it’s a special thing when people come out with something so difficult to really begin dealing with it.
It just gets me, you know, gets me a little bit chilled emotional. It just, it’s such an honor to talk with people about this when they just don’t, having not told anybody in their lives, you know, what they’ve
Adam Cloninger: experienced. I guess you can end it on like a good note.
Chris Gazdik: People get well,
Adam Cloninger: well, you kinda wanted to mention it at a certain point and without going in specific details, but [00:57:00] we talked about for probably a couple years now about actually doing shows.
Not in the office. Nothing, nothing
Chris Gazdik: specific, but, oh yeah. Can we get specific about
Adam Cloninger: this? No, no, I don’t, I don’t, don’t think we should get specific yet, but. We’ve been talking about doing that and I, I think that’s ending the show on a good highlight there. Yeah.
Chris Gazdik: It’s a possible good thing. We’re doing some cool things with, through a therapist eyes, you know, growing a show and doing some neat and fun things and you know, stay tuned with us cuz you know, we, we keep on creating ideas and you know, we need you to help us by, you know, supporting us and coming out and, you know, giving us the stars and the likes and, you know, all that kind of thing.
Like, we, we really want we, we really wanna make a difference for, for you and your life. We really wanna make a difference for you and your life as it relates to, you know, your human emotional experience. I mean, that’s what, that’s really what we’re, we’re all about. So the human emotional experience, we endeavor to figure it out together.
Closing thoughts, guys? Anything to add? There were two good shows [00:58:00] in the month of June, but we’re doing a whole lot more than than two shows. Three down now. Three closing thoughts on Neil.
Neil Robinson: When, when are we going to go to our first ra first rage room?
Chris Gazdik: When are we gonna go to our first rage room? Oh we might need to check that stuff out this weekend.
Cause that sounds fun. I can get some stuff off my chest. Adam, we’ll see you I guess next week, guys. Yep. This is through a therapist eyes and we do endeavor to figure this out together with you. The human emotional experience is such a powerful reality and, and we want you to continue coming alongside with us to, to figure it out and to to get well.
If you have experienced sexual abuse in any way, reach out. Don’t be alone. This will not defeat you after sexual abuse. Take care.