Episode #88 – Kids, Sports, and the Coronavirus

The Coronavirus lockdown has created many challenges in our lives and especially in the lives of our kids.

Chris shares his thoughts on the impact it’s having on our children, their social lives, learning, and much more.

He also talks about the impact of no Sport on our society.  Sports has become such a big part of our society and it’s been almost three months since we’ve seen live sporting events apart from the UFC.

Tune in to see Kids, Sports, and the Coronavirus Through a Therapist’s Eyes!

Listen to Episode #88 – Kids, Sports, and the Coronavirus:

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Episode #88 Transcription

Craig Graves: [00:00:00] Episode 87, the Corona virus and kids

Chris Gazdik: [00:00:06] and sports

Craig Graves: [00:00:08] and sports.

Chris Gazdik: [00:00:08] Yeah, man,

Craig Graves: [00:00:10] it’s kind of a mixed topic.

Chris Gazdik: [00:00:11] I know, right. It was a, it was thrown together thing. Cause a timing with the schedule and all that, like I told you before the Mike’s came on, but

Craig Graves: [00:00:17] Hey man, the good news is there’s a fight this weekend. UFC is coming back.

Chris Gazdik: [00:00:22] Oh, is that what, uh, our buddy was talking about? I didn’t show you the post.

Craig Graves: [00:00:26] No, I didn’t see any posts, but yeah,

Chris Gazdik: [00:00:27] I think I knew he was fighting. That’s going to be good.

Craig Graves: [00:00:29] Tony Ferguson is going to fight, um, Golly. What’s the kid’s name?

Chris Gazdik: [00:00:33] Is that this weekend. Mother’s day. Weekend.

Craig Graves: [00:00:34] Yeah. And then mother’s day weekend.

Chris Gazdik: [00:00:36] We’re going to talk about this over the air or off the air, man.

My brother’s coming into town. I got to see, Oh my goodness. Okay. We’ll talk about that. Listen, this is through a therapist. I’s the podcast where you get to see the world through the lens of a real mental health and substance abuse therapist, knowing that this is not the delivery of therapy services in any way, uh, feedback and discussion on throughatherapistseyes.com.

The podcast blog tab, Craig, you got life coaching going on a unbeatable mind. Life coaches is Craig. Graves’ hanging out with me, the cohost and I am Chris Gazdak and I got the book going on coming on, coming out soon sometime.

Craig Graves: [00:01:11] Yeah, man. I’m happy for your book. This is going to be awesome.

Chris Gazdik: [00:01:13] Yeah, it’s a, they’re doing the cover now there we’re uncovered design cooler.

Craig Graves: [00:01:17] Our logo for the podcast may change as a result of this guy. So keep it, keep an eye out for that. Hey, we got the Facebook live going. I’m not sure how many folks are on watching right now, but if you have questions for us during the show, then please type it in there.

Chris Gazdik: [00:01:33] Yeah, we’re going to get used to doing that we’re experiment and with the Facebook live deal, uh, we’ll get better and refine.

So you’ll know what to expect. We’ll probably kind of, you know, get a, definitely a routine going. So you’ll know when it’s on. Uh, you can be kind of looking out for that. We’re really trying to do some new things here at, through a therapist’s eyes. Uh, listen, this is going to be a different, uh, kind of a different kind of show in the sense that we’re just going to really a little bit of a shorter concept.

We’re not going to go very long today. Um, it’s kind of a little bit of a filler, a show in the sense of, um, you know, Couple of thoughts that I had specifically about the corona virus, really, for the purpose of bringing up awareness on, on kind of what’s going on all around us. I know we’re all aware, but through my eyes, as a therapist, I’ve, I’ve, I’ve been thinking of some things you wanted to do.

Some COVID related shows the specific topics, and I’m trying to comply mr. Graves with your request. And this is what that is. Um, so what, what this is is just a corona virus of our short kids in sports. Uh, and I’m really going to be curious as we go along Mmm. Gave you the notes ahead of time to be thinking about it, particularly on the sports version, but you know how you see these concerns, man, I’m really curious in your brain and what you’re thinking, because I’ve really kind of begun to become very aware of the high level of concerns that I have about kids, children, you know, it, it feels like.

Adults. Mmm. You know, we’ve got work at home and, you know, stay at home practices that are different and yeah. Mmm. We’ll adjust to that. We’ll kind of get our norm set up. You know, as a matter of fact, I had some people in the office tell me, he’s like, I’m starting to feel like I got a routine thing going, you know?

And, and, and I think that generally adults will, will kind of find ways to get to adjust and get okay. But kids, I really feel like they don’t even know kind of what’s going on, that’s affecting them. And that they’re really going to be struggling. And so I wanted to go down through some of those, and maybe you can kick in your brain, you know, with what we could do about it and how to go.

Cause I didn’t really prepare that part of it in my show, prep, I’ve just started kicking through, you know, more and more concerns about how the things are going on for kids. So let’s try this first one on for size, for instance, uh, in school. I mean the biggest thing is affecting kids is they’re not going to school, right?

Craig Graves: [00:03:46] I’m not sure if that’s the biggest thing or not, but definitely that’s a huge, huge factor.

Chris Gazdik: [00:03:50] Right? Uh, well, I mean, you know, that, that brings on all, all the other social things and all the other aspects, you know, big, but not going to school is kind of like they’re working from home and, and, but they, but I don’t know if we realized that, you know, they’ve also got all the other things that they’re kind of really concerned and freaked out about.

I mean, Kids as young as five and six years old can have OCD and they’re struggling anyway. And, and, and they don’t have a voice to be able to put towards that. And so part of my therapy work with people is helping a child, by the way, if you’re a parent or a loved one of a kid, you know, part of what you could do is really just sort of help them figure out what it is that they can’t really voice because they don’t really have the intellect, particularly at younger ages, you know, to, to be aware.

Of what it is that they’re feeling and what they’re, what they’re thinking. Mmm. By the way, I need you to help on the timer again. Cause my timer is up there on the Facebook live, man. This is all very different. Trying to get used to this new crap. Gotta get my flow down. So anyway, let me, let me get back to where, you know, kids are.

Mmm. Particularly in the transition years, man, if you think about it kindergarten and first grade is the primary transition year that has been blown. up. But all the transition years is how kids are really being affected in school. Uh, kindergarten, first grade I’ll come back to that fifth grade going to sixth grade, right.

And an eighth grade going to freshmen. Hmm. And then seniors that are leaving  and ironically, I got two of those right now. I got a freshmen and I’ve got a senior that’s leaving high school. Wow. Right. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And, and, and those transition years are really, really jacked up. Because when you’re, when you’re, when you’re in the sixth grade or in the fifth grade, and you’re getting ready to go up into this big middle school thing, you really need that prep time at the end of the year to like, get geared up, to get kind of ready to like, Oh my gosh, what’s, it’s going to be like, or in the sixth grade, like, okay, I’m in middle school.

What is, what am I doing? Great. My ninth grader is a freshmen. I remember very distinctly. He had a conversation with me. He’s like, ah, dad, you remember what it’s like? I’m just trying to get used to. In our school and in high school and

Craig Graves: [00:06:00] yeah, yeah, yeah. I see your point. I see your point with the seniors man, but the, but the other guys have had, they had half of a year, so it ain’t a complete loss.

I mean, they’re, they’ve at least experienced and tasted school and in middle school and high school. I mean, you’re not going in cold next year.

Chris Gazdik: [00:06:17] It’s a taste, but it’s only a taste because my freshmen and I was talking to him directly about it, trying to guide him through this. Cause he’s not aware of any of this, by the way, he it’s as fine, Dad, whatever I’m doing.

And that’s a big deal, whatever, well, whatever is not right, because when you’re a freshmen or any of those transition years, You’re you’re spending a month, two months by three months into high school. You’re kinda like, okay. Yeah. These big kids over here with beards that’s okay. I can hang his, this is high school and you start catching your groove.

They’ve only had about a month or two of that. They’re going to come back as sophomores and they’re really going to have to kind of go back through that cultural processing. Right, right. Yeah. I mean, there’s an emotional thing that’s happening,

Craig Graves: [00:06:58] but how do you think the, I mean, part of being a freshmen or being a first year, middle school student, it’s being the low person, right?

The person on the totem pole, you’re not going to be that they’re going to actually have some people who were, you know,

Chris Gazdik: [00:07:11] but they’re going to feel that way

Craig Graves: [00:07:12] under them.

Chris Gazdik: [00:07:12] They’re going to feel that way, that transitioning isn’t happening. And Oh, by the way, when school starts in August or whatever, These kids aren’t might not have normalicy then either

Craig Graves: [00:07:24] kids are pretty resilient.

Right. I mean, so how are you seeing questions from parents in your office or from kids in your office? I mean, how do you think, which was your experience and stuff like that?

Chris Gazdik: [00:07:36] My thinking process. Yeah. And, and, and, and, and I think I’ll begin seeing that when kids are. Next year. Yeah. You know, when they’re, when they’re kind of trying to adjust to essentially what is five or six months of summer, I don’t think they have any idea yet.

And I don’t think we’re prepared for it. So part of this show is like, what do we need to be prepared for? And how can we be, well, I haven’t really put a lot of thought to how can we be prepared for, but I think that what’s so crazy about this coronavirus is things are happening. Like so fast decisions are being made and situations are occurring and we don’t even know.

What to anticipate. So this is probably an attempt to sort of anticipate some of those things. A good example with this cool socialization or culture. Greg, you talked to any, any kindergarten teacher or especially first graders, first grade teachers. We’ll talk about the first day of school and the last day of school being wildly different.

Do you remember that when your kids were small?

Craig Graves: [00:08:33] I don’t specifically remember that. No.

Chris Gazdik: [00:08:35] Yeah, man, the teachers will tell you it’s chaos. The first month or two or three, like it’s kids don’t understand. You have to sit down, you have to do your math. Now we sit and play and there’s a structure. There’s a process by the end of the year, first grade teachers are loving it because it’s like, Oh, it’s that?

They know what’s going on. They’re there, they’re doing their thing. And, and it’s so much smoother. But the beginning is like very difficult on those teachers. So that socialization is what I’m talking about. That’s going to be a major, a major concern. Am I getting your brain to think about that?

Craig Graves: [00:09:05] Okay. Maybe a little bit,

Chris Gazdik: [00:09:06] right. Seriously or no, not really. For real. Okay. I can’t read your facial expression.

Craig Graves: [00:09:12] You know, I think it probably means more to older, older kids that are at the high school level. Maybe. Although, I’m not seeing a lot of those kids, you know, I don’t know my, my kids kinda miss school and they want to be going to school.

You know, they miss their friends and stuff like that. So I can, you know, I can see it being, being issues.

Chris Gazdik: [00:09:29] Oh. Which goes to the second one that I’m thinking about with kids, the lack of social contact. I mean, seriously, you know, families are struggling to lead, uh, you know, to be the only outlet, you know, for.

For their social life and their only outlet, you know, essentially is a lot of the video game platforms and the social media stuff. And we’ve done shows about how that increases anxiety and whatnot, right? Yeah. Yeah. I think kids, we did a show also on, on loneliness as an epidemic. Yeah. It is exploding right now.

Yeah. In kids. I mean, they they’re feeling completely alone. I’m thinking, even though they’re plugged into social media and they think in their own mind, I am fine. I’m talking to all my friends.

Craig Graves: [00:10:14] Yeah. It’s definitely not. It’s stepping out of the same social media. Maybe it keeps you abreast of what’s going on, but there’s no substitute for like, you know, in person interaction.

It’s not a substitute for that.

Chris Gazdik: [00:10:25] Yeah. Yeah, the education system doesn’t really care. This is item number three, as I was thinking about kids. And by the way, when I wrote these down and went through this. And I, and I, I literally did it at the end of the day yesterday, and I drove home as I’m driving home. I was thinking of more and more and more honestly, I just didn’t have time to write them all down and to prepare it, to be honest with you, because you know, another aspect of it that, that bothers me in the concern that kids are taking in their own eyes.

And this isn’t by any means an indoctrination on what teachers are wanting to do. But the fact is kids are feeling like school doesn’t care. This is a joke and it doesn’t matter because the CA the events are being canceled. Um, you know, uh, kids are passing just seemingly passing through. I hear all a lot, dude.

I have Craig. I am hearing most of my kids right now that are middle school. I have a couple of in elementary school, and they’re kind of saying, you know, we don’t have to do this work. The work doesn’t matter. It’s not being graded, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, all on ghost. And I think they’re really getting the message that unfortunately, the school doesn’t really care about me.

Teachers aren’t really responding. I don’t get an email response or I’m not making a connection. That zoom thing is weird. It’s off, off the chain and this is more middle school in high school kids. I think the zoom platforms for the elementary school was probably working out really well. But as this goes on for many, many months now, are kids going to lose the connection to a certain extent with their schools about their schools, caring about them.

I wonder, I really, I wonder out loud.

Craig Graves: [00:12:00] So you’re saying, you’re wondering if the kids will say that again,

Chris Gazdik: [00:12:05] the kids are feeling like the school doesn’t care about them. The teachers don’t give a rip. The fact is that stuff’s being canceled. Nobody really cares if I’m doing the work. No, not really even grading it.

The inherent message there that I fear. And I see a little bit is that kids are feeling, we’re

Craig Graves: [00:12:22] I am not getting that from my kids and teachers, you know, If my teachers, if my kid’s teachers are listening, you guys are doing a great job. Seriously. All. I think that they are engaged. I get emails from, from, well, I have had emails from teachers.

You know, asking about things. So I think that, I don’t think that’s the case, at least in my experience.

Chris Gazdik: [00:12:42] Well as have I, but now let me be clear. What I’m saying is in the minds of many kids.

Craig Graves: [00:12:50] Okay, good, . Okay.could be

Chris Gazdik: [00:12:52] In the minds of many kids they  have developed a relationship with their teachers and believe it or not particularly disadvantaged kids and kids that don’t have a good home environment or stable supports and a lot of structure at home.

They’re feeling dropped like left because I’m alone now. And a really supportive place that I was in every day is suddenly gone.

Craig Graves: [00:13:19] Yeah. But do you think they understand what’s going on and realize that that’s not, what’s not what’s happening. They haven’t been dropped they’re out of school for a reason.

Chris Gazdik: [00:13:26] Exactly.  but emotions don’t give a rip. You w when you talk about a lot of times in the therapy office, like, you know, what, what are we talking about and how does this work? Like, there are a lot of times we have emotions about things and we don’t know it, adults, us all of us, we’re emotional. And we don’t even realize that we’re emotional about it.

And I know that’s crazy, but I know that in myself, I experienced that. And I think this is happening a lot in the minds of kids right now. You’re not feeling cared about.

Craig Graves: [00:13:55] It could be, no, I was doing a quick Google search to see. What the, how does the coronavirus affect children? So I don’t usually prep for the show I’m coming in cold and, you know, I always beat up on the media, but it’s like, uh, why are children seemingly immune to Corona virus?

Why children are not immune to COVID-19. Why aren’t you, why children seem to be less affected by coronavirus? So this is like the disinformation, you know, right here in the, on the front page of Google, why kids are not affected how kids are affected, you know, so it’s just, it’s, it’s, it’s kind of off, off of the subject, but, um,

Chris Gazdik: [00:14:29] well, it’s funny because we are, it is a little off subject.

I don’t want to go down the bunny hole again. We’ve done that a little bit before, but we’re part of the media and I’m just kind of sharing my thoughts and that’s what I, I preface the show early with is these are just my thoughts as a therapist, working with kids, things I’ve brainstormed and thought about.

And things that I see as potential concerns. And as, as you point out, it’s not going to be that way with all kids. I mean, as a matter of fact, I think my son older son love you, Aaron, he’s the prototypical kid for this type of a situation because he’s like, you know, he’s not, he’s not worried about it.

Yeah. He’s, he’s just done and he’s like, fine, I’m out. Right. So he’s not a good example for that. Uh, but, but other kids very much, very much are I I’m fearful. And so it’s not this isn’t across the board. But here’s the, here’s a fact part, honestly. So of all of those that I just cited off a major concern that I have, that we’re going to need to be prepared for.

As a society is department of social services factors. Okay. Some other States have it as a department health and human services. There’s a, there’s other names, basically the social services in our state it’s DSS department, social services that helps a central feature of protecting kids in homes. Okay.

Craig, can you take any guests where the primary reporters are of. Uh, neglect physical or sexual abuse.

Craig Graves: [00:15:52] Oh, it had definitely the school a

Chris Gazdik: [00:15:54] hundred percent.

Craig Graves: [00:15:55] Yeah, definitely is school.

Chris Gazdik: [00:15:56] Well, what’s happening now that school’s not in place,

Craig Graves: [00:16:00] that, that the, those kids aren’t, those reports aren’t happening.

Chris Gazdik: [00:16:04] Right. There’s actually a show notes thing I’ll put on here that, that, uh, he’ll have on the show notes is, Mmm. The article quote, reports of child abuse are down nearly 40% in South Carolina from this time last year. That scares me to death, dude. Right? Like, think about this. As far as what kids are experiencing, parents are stressed out.

Finances are dropping during unemployment and all the crazy stuff going on. And you’ve got to assume that domestic violence and child abuse and neglect are rocketing increased. So, not that we need 40% decreased reporting, we actually need probably 40% increased reporting because this stuff is going on.

Craig Graves: [00:16:51] Yeah. So we just talked to ’em a couple in our last show about marriage and coronavirus, right. They told us that the divorce lawyers were busier than ever, you know, even in the short time we’ve been quarantined. We thought a Joshua was Shay. He says, you know, porn, porn, addiction and porn usage is going up, you know, Porn companies are opening up premium content for people get for free.

Yeah. Mmm. Reports of child abuse. And that kind of stuff is going down by 40%, Chris, 40%, you know? So I don’t want to get blasted by, by our audience or whatever, but at some point you got to say, man, is the lockdown, is the cure worse than the then the virus? Yeah, because you know, um, there’s some pretty good data out there now.

You know, and kids are largely unaffected by this coronavirus thing. So, I mean, what are your thoughts on, on, on opening back up and trying to get back to some level of, of normalcy in the world? I mean, because you know, these people who were saying, well, We’re going to be worse off. If we don’t get back, get back to the business.

Chris Gazdik: [00:17:54] Funny, you should say, you know, I was kind of bummed at myself and by the way, you just said kids, you know, people think kids are not affected. I’m trying to blow that myth up. Cause I think that’s a myth. I think that’s missing

Craig Graves: [00:18:03] I think they are from the things you’re talking about, but I think that the, the health. The, the, the rates of,

Chris Gazdik: [00:18:08] Oh, the infection and the actual physical stuff is very low for children.

I agree. But, but all this emotional stuff is huge. So, you know, to answer that, I have really felt like, uh, yeah, thanks. Getting dark in here. You know, I have really felt like. And I, and I was joking with a lot of our clients actually like, you know, Hey man, I should’ve come out public and said this because now a guy came out and he stole my thunder.

And what I was thinking probably about a month ago, probably it’s not an original thought, but have you heard about the dance and the, and the hammer and the dance metaphor?

Craig Graves: [00:18:38] No, I haven’t.

Chris Gazdik: [00:18:38] Oh, you haven’t even heard anything so, well, I just happened to see it on CNN and I heard it on a podcast show and, and I think I saw it in a.

Paper as well, somewhere, this guy came out with a metaphor and he was talking about the responses. And so it’s the same thought that I actually had. I felt like there needed to be two weeks quarantine, two weeks back in public, two weeks quarantine, two weeks back in public. So you had this back and forth reality.

And I think that that’s probably what we’re going to be studying in the years and really the decade to come because I’m not a medical expert, Craig, but I don’t think that people are trying to, you know, do something bad to the world. I think they’re really kind of saying, as we did quarantine with, with other pandemics and stuff in the world before, this is not unprecedented, we’ve done this before people forget history.

But this has happened before, and this is the way society responded, but to mass scale it like this and keep it that way. All these other concerns come up. So I feel like we’ve got to do the medically prudent thing with a novel virus, like the medical people that are talking about that. I just, I have nothing but the trust because I don’t know, coupled and backing that down with my professional understanding of what’s happening emotionally.

And so this dance method of being able to manage this thing so that we’re doing what we need to do to save lives and what the medical professionals are saying scientifically with, with all of that mixed with getting social. Cause we’re meant to be that way. Yeah. That’s my take.

Craig Graves: [00:20:11] I think the point is like dr. Phil was on a news channel. And he said, he said something similar to this and he got blasted for it. Yeah. And I keep hearing people say, we need to save lives. The lockdowns saving lives, the quarantine is saving lives and it is, you know, and I’m not downplaying the seriousness of the virus. I’ve got elderly parents and elderly aunts and family, and I don’t want them to get sick, but I think that the, the point a lot of people are making is we’re saving lives now at the expense of lives later.

Because of poverty and domestic violence and the things that we’re talking about here. So, I mean, you’re damned if you do and damned, if you don’t,

Chris Gazdik: [00:20:49] it’s a tough situation to make good decisions. And by the way, you gotta to make them right now. Right? This is not waiting for you to think about it. This is not waiting for you to study it and to see what might happen.

It’s like a now reality now are we could have been prepared, but. I feel like we’re going a little bit too far down this bunny hole, but I didn’t plan it, but that’s okay. It’s a conversation everybody’s having in the, in the world and we can put our art, our take on it. I feel like there’s gotta be a balance.

You know, it, it, it, it, it has to be a balance of managing other health needs, pandemic realities, and mental health needs, which involves, I feel like some sort of dance.

Craig Graves: [00:21:31] Yeah. And, and you say, uh, other health needs that’s, that’s a good point. You bring up too, because people aren’t going to the doctor now and they’re there.

Yeah. No there’s death because of other issues that normally somebody might’ve gone and gotten treated for.

Chris Gazdik: [00:21:43] Yeah. It’s definitely, probably fair to say because of the social media impact, I will predict we will come out and understand that we’ve acted too much out of fear. I think you’re right. Right. I’ve been calling for prudent decision.

Do you remember this? We covered I’ll cover it again. Prudent decisions. Based on a calm attitude. So we don’t have shame. Remember we talked about that or fear driving the thing and thirdly, uh, awareness. Yeah, because we cannot be blowing this off. We cannot be saying, this is just no big deal. This is just a mild flu and it’s going to go away and stuff like that.

It’s not, and it hasn’t, and it’s probably not going to, so we need prudent decisions based on a calm attitude with an awareness built in. Yeah, I think that nails it I’ve I’ve I kinda got that early on and it, those three things have stuck with me throughout this whole thing. Cool. Okay. Well, let’s move on and get out of that.

Um, the kids, those are some thoughts about kids, as I’m talking about that. Craig, do you have any ideas real quick, super quick. Cause we’re not gonna spend a lot of time today, but uh, kids are passing on and they’re unprepared. A lack of social contact and family struggling internally, social media impacts the education system appearing in the minds of eyes of kids that they don’t really care.

And then the DSS factors, what are we going to do about that? Any pop off in your brain?

Craig Graves: [00:23:06] Well, we can’t change any of that right now. You know, you really can’t. I mean, I think you do the best you can, you put them on a schedule, you know, you don’t let them stay up all night and sleep all day. You kind of keep them in some kind of a routine with their, with their schoolwork, you know, encourage them to get outside and, uh, get some sunlight and stuff like that.

Maybe you, uh, if you’re home, if you’re a homeschooler you’re implementing or a recess routine or whatever it is. Mmm.

Chris Gazdik: [00:23:30] You know, there is one of these ones that you can do something about you, you just, you kind of struck me. When you said that, and I was looking down through these thoughts that I had, you just struck me.

You’re like, well, you can’t really change any of those things right now. Kind of like, dang, is he right? You’re mostly right. I think unfortunately, but the one that you really can is to help kids understand that they are cared about. Oh yeah. Yeah. Definitely. Their teacher cares about it. The schools care about you.

Particularly with the younger kids, the open, you know what? Hold on a minute. You know what? With older kids as well, because we know something about teenagers, they talk a lot of bravado. They talk a lot of smack. They talk, they, they appear like they really don’t give a rip. They don’t care about you. They don’t want to be around you.

You know what guys, you got to carry some x-ray vision as adults about that. It’s hard to do that as a parent, speaking of myself, but see through that because these kids also need to know that they’re cared about. So I’m, I’m correcting myself by saying, especially with younger kids with younger or older kids alike, they really need to know that the world does care about them.

They’re not forgotten.

Craig Graves: [00:24:32] Yeah. And I’ll ask my kids, how are you, how are you doing with this? You know, you’re scared what’s going on with you, you know? Yeah. You’re doing all right. Oh, fine. Doing fine. No problem. What are you afraid? You’re gonna get sick, you know, whatever. Yeah. I

Chris Gazdik: [00:24:45] assume there’s some emotion. It might be a suggestion that comes to my mind because there is. There is they’re fearful. They’re uncomfortable. They’re lonely. They’re scared. They’re angry. You know, the, these things are there, but they’re not going to show you the older that they are. The youngest probably will show you. So assume that it’s there, even if they say, Oh yeah, that dude.

Yeah, I’m fine, man. Don’t worry about it. That’s fine. It really probably isn’t all right. Let’s move on and be, be, be, be quick about this. I don’t know how much, how long we’ve been going, man. Do you have any idea? I don’t either. So we’ll, we’ll be kind of quick, cause I promise to be a little bit of a short one on this one, but uh, major league sports.

Let’s, let’s talk about sports and mental health, sports and mental health, you know, right now in the world per a podcast, which by the way, can you make a special note of that for the notes? I want to beat people, be able to read, respond to it. Or two to look at, in fact, check the wall street journal podcast episode for may the first Friday, may the first you can have that on the show notes and people can check that out as a highlight.

They’re at least saying that Taiwan is the only league playing in the world. That is the only sports thing going on right now is in Taiwan. They’re playing some baseball. Really? Yes, that’s it in the world.

Craig Graves: [00:26:00] I need to find that. Now I can stream that seriously. Yeah. Really. I’d love to see some baseball. Right?

Chris Gazdik: [00:26:05] I know you would. You, you’re a baseball guy.

Craig Graves: [00:26:07] Yeah. I like baseball, man.

Chris Gazdik: [00:26:08] You know, that is sad. That’s amazing to me. And that’s gotta be maybe the first time in the, in the history of, of man. I would wonder. If the fact is that, that that’s never happened before.

Craig Graves: [00:26:20] Well, how is, uh, how how’s, how’s the thing in Taiwan? Is it, or they

Chris Gazdik: [00:26:23] listen to their show? They document some of that. Yeah. There’s some interesting questions in it. That’ll I think you’ll be, I honestly, Craig, you speak, especially as person knowing you. I think you’ll enjoy that wall street journal podcast, but what do they provide? Sports is an obvious release from stress is a distraction.

That’s that’s that’s not going to be any, any, no amazing back to anybody. But here’s another thing. The physical needs of kids, particularly going back to kids should have been on my list before. Right. You know, they’re not getting a lot of physical activity. They’re not getting that. Uh, and also as adults, you know, you can’t play sports.

Sports is a huge part. Whether you’re talking about dance, Well, you’re talking about going into a dance clubs. Um, you know, when you’re talking about tennis or just kicking around, like, I don’t want to play with anybody in a ball right now, basketball. That’s the stupidest thing ever.

Craig Graves: [00:27:13] Jujitsu, man. I’m an out,

Chris Gazdik: [00:27:15] you’ve been shut down. Yeah. Yeah. And you can’t go on those mats. I mean, if anybody has coronavirus and they jump into the dojo, it’s going to be all over the mats. Right.

Craig Graves: [00:27:26] I guess. So

Chris Gazdik: [00:27:28] it’s danger. It is. That’s the reality of some of what we’re talking about. You will, you will spread it. So. The physical exercise for adults and us in kids and as adults is, is severely curved.

Um, the other thing is I look at sports is being, if you look at all your, you remember your sociology class as a kid,

Craig Graves: [00:27:47] I don’t think I took sociology.

Chris Gazdik: [00:27:49] You didn’t take Sociology.

Craig Graves: [00:27:50] No, I think it was an elective and I didn’t take it.

Chris Gazdik: [00:27:52] I thought everybody though took sociology.

Craig Graves: [00:27:54] Well, if I did it, I don’t remember it.

Chris Gazdik: [00:27:56] That’s a whole nother episode.

It’s a pillar of society. I feel like sports know government. Religion sports and family. Like these are really important. And

Craig Graves: [00:28:09] I think, you know, football is a religion. I mean, you know, it’s sports is definitely a huge part of, of, of life and in our, in our world these days.

Chris Gazdik: [00:28:17] And here’s one of the psychological things about it, right.

It creates a tribal identity. It does it’s group mentality. It’s a connection, right? You’re a part of something you’re in national identity. Yeah. It’s why the Olympics are so big around the world. Yeah, it creates connections in a psychological way. And I’ve always told my wife over the years, you know, it’s not the it’s not who wins and who loses.

I mean, that’s fun too, but it’s the stories behind the sport. So the competitive nature of things figure skating and what you gotta do to get on a top level. It’s, it’s amazing stories. And we live vicariously through the emotional stories that we watched that we’re drawn to because we identify with them.

We actually are a part of all of that. And that’s all stripped away. I don’t have an answer, but what’s the effect. This is going on anywhere in the world right now. What is the effect of that? You losing a pillar of the way that we as a human being has functioned? No, I don’t think people were thinking about that when we were talking about, well, is baseball going to be able to come back?

We need the psychological aspects of what it provides I would maintain. So that’s my shot across the bow. What do you see? What are you thinking are sports important? Is that a part of the corona virus story?

Craig Graves: [00:29:36] Yeah, I definitely think it is man. I mean, sports is, like I said, sports is a huge part of our, uh, of our, of our lives in America.

And, and, um, it’s an out for some people, you know, I have friends, men who watch college football on Saturday football on Sunday, you know, basketball they’re there. They just, sports is their thing. And right now, and they’re having to find something else to do, or either watch reruns. I know some people are watching reruns of sporting events.

I’m not going to do that. You know what though? I have watched some UFC fights that are, uh, but I don’t know who’s going to win. You know, I’ve only been a UFC fan now for about a year, year and a half. Yeah. So I actually saw John Jones fight a good fight. The other, I think I sent it to me.

Chris Gazdik: [00:30:12] Oh, you did? he more than crushed em.

Craig Graves: [00:30:17] But I know a lot of folks who were watching the old world series games and stuff like that. And I’m like, dude, I’m not watching them a rerun of a sporting event when I know who wins. That’s just not me. I’m not,

Chris Gazdik: [00:30:27] it’s a way that friends connect. I’m actually really excited. My brother’s coming in town this weekend and I want to, I want to watch the fight with you.

I really feel that I really it’s important for my mental health to watch the fight. Uh, with you, if I can, if we can arrange it this weekend. And that’s just a little example in the moment, right. Because I, it’s a way that we’ve hung out. You and I, right. Yeah. And, and that’s important. Th th th th th the social aspects are psychologically what human beings rely on the function.

Can I, can I say that sentence? That’s just real in the real time. Yeah. But the sports are a big piece of the social aspect that we rely on psychologically to function

Craig Graves: [00:31:03] watching and participating. Right. I saw my buddy from the, from the Academy yesterday and he’s like, Mmm. And he’s a Charlotte Mecklenburg police officer.

And he’s like, man, jujitsu is my stress release. I said, I come in here and I rolled you Jitsu for a couple of hours. He said, and I’m. A different person. When I leave, he said, it’s like, like I say, he’s like, it’s my therapy, you know, jujitsu is, and I haven’t had that in two months or listen,  you, man.

Chris Gazdik: [00:31:32] your instructor, Sean McGinnis was, was brilliant in a show here with us.

And he absolutely, I think nailed it and, and, and, and was able to describe the emotional change that it brought in his life from being a police officer and a parole officer for so many years. And I don’t tell him it was so amazing to meet him and talk to him and see, and he said, Oh yeah, I get that all the time.

There was no police officer vibe in, in, in talking to him and stuff.

Craig Graves: [00:32:04] Sean is, Sean is a, is a weapon. I have been down there helping him film some stuff for the, put the put on Facebook. And so he’s, he’s obviously, Mmm. Top of the line jujitsu. Uh, instructor in practitioner. Yeah, but I’ve been filming him in the other arts too.

My mind is blown. You know other, yeah. He teaches three teachers, three arts teachers have Quito, TaeKwonDo and jujitsu, and I’ve been, so I’ve been watching him do the other two. Oh, wow.  along with juJitsu now.

Chris Gazdik: [00:32:30] You’ve only seen him. Jujitsu did see when you’re seeing him.

Craig Graves: [00:32:33] He’s a killer man.

Chris Gazdik: [00:32:35] Got you. You’re even more afraid of him now.

Craig Graves: [00:32:38] Killer.

Chris Gazdik: [00:32:39] That’s funny, man.

Craig Graves: [00:32:40] You know, I was ever thinking of Sean got me on the ground. He’d kill me. He wouldn’t even get to the ground before he killed me.

Chris Gazdik: [00:32:46] And you wanted me to go down there that dojo, man, now I’m more afraid. Well, let’s, let’s wrap this up and get out of there. Kids or adults. Don’t don’t, don’t doubt that kids are affected by this and your Google search concerns me as a, a person who works with kids.

I would argue that they absolutely are not immune to this. Emotionally and mental health in any regard, quite to the contrary and then sports is not, you know, guys, when you typically ladies, you know, well, I’m not ladies. I sh I should back up on that because there are many men that criticize sports. Like that’s not essential.

That’s not important. Why all these overpriced overpaid, you know, athletes in there. Yeah. There’s a lot of issues with, with football players, you know, not standing for the Anthem, just stuff like that. I’m not talking about those issues. I’m talking about sports is not just a meaningless part of life. It is a pillar of society and we’re going to be a lot more mentally healthy when we’re able to watch the types of things that we enjoy and do the types of things that we’re able, that we enjoy doing like rolling and jujitsu.

Yeah. Going to dance class. How many people would freaking scream for a yoga class right now? And I’m not talking about on the zoom platforms. I mean, I’ve got clients that are actually talking about it and getting together with the families and they’re zooming and they’re doing yoga together and that’s cool.

Do you need that live connection?

Craig Graves: [00:34:13] Yeah, I’d be interested to hear your, you don’t have to do it tonight. We’re running short on time, but I’d be interested to hear how you think some of the things we’re learning from this can be applied after. Yeah. We’re through it, like online schools and stuff like that, you know?

Mmm. I don’t know. It’s just about, I think it’d be an interesting conversation, almost my ideas, and maybe just bounce them off of each other about how we could, you mean like you’ve, you’re opened up now to the online therapy, right? You’re seeing some clients over the

Chris Gazdik: [00:34:37] telephone therapy. Yes. Yeah.

Craig Graves: [00:34:38] And so you didn’t think that was a good idea till you’re forced to do it now. You’re kind of, you’re kind of on board with that now.

Chris Gazdik: [00:34:44] Absolutely.

Craig Graves: [00:34:44] Yeah, absolutely. Definitely some good things that are going to come out of this too.

Chris Gazdik: [00:34:47] I think so. I think so. All right, man, let’s take us out of here and, uh, we’ll, we’ll fire up with a full scale thing next week. Sorry, if we got, we just get verbal, we just go after talking. don’t we.

Craig Graves: [00:34:57] Yes. A lot of fun, man,

Chris Gazdik: [00:34:59] but we, but I guess I’ll end with this. Uh, Craig, you know, fear is a scary thing. Fear is a, is a as a necessary part of life. It helps us a little bit, but in times like this. W we’ve really got to put a coupling on, on how fearfully we act, you know, prudent decisions based on a calm attitude and awareness and tax those three things.

And the important one on the second part. . I am seeing a lot of fear based feelings being thrown around in the world that we live. And we need to have hope and clarity that this we will get through this. This is gonna get better. This is where this is not the end of our life. It’s not the end of our existence, and we need to keep a view with a vision towards the future, given hopefulness and trust in ourselves that we will be able to get through this fear.

This is not a time for fear, sir.

Craig Graves: [00:35:58] The only thing we have to fear is fear itself. It’s true.

Chris Gazdik: [00:36:03] That’s a brilliant, yeah. Okay. The phrase that he created back in those days,

Craig Graves: [00:36:07] who said that was FDR, FDR Kennedy or FTR? Yeah.

Chris Gazdik: [00:36:13] Franklin Delano Roosevelt. I want to say it was FDR. No, no, it was Kennedy during the missile.

I don’t know what to look it up.

Craig Graves: [00:36:20] Yeah, we’ll look it up. Google it.

Chris Gazdik: [00:36:22] All right, Craig, take us out of here, man.

Craig Graves: [00:36:24] Throughatherapistseyes.com folks, she can find out about them. Mmm. I blew that on the last one.

Chris Gazdik: [00:36:29] Did it again?

Craig Graves: [00:36:30] I did it twice. You can find out more about the show and Chris and myself on throughatherapistseyes.com links to our social media or out there. Links to each show, you can find us on just about any podcast platform. And, um, I think that’s it, man.

Chris Gazdik: [00:36:46] We’ll get better with this Facebook live thing, incorporating it into the show and getting into some routine with it. So you know what to expect, but I hope you guys are enjoying at a, at least an experiment.

We’ll clean it up and figure out how to work it a little bit better for your enjoyment. We’ll see you guys next week.